One Day in 365





I'll start this post by saying that I am not expecting any sympathy off the back of this post, but the post is merely a reflection of how I've felt in recent years on a few occasions. Unfortunately these occasions are usually birthdays and Christmas'.

Ever since me and Nikki bought our first house together, about 8 years ago, I stopped 'wanting' things, as when do I want something I can become very obsessed until i get the item in question. The reason I did this was to ensure Nikki had any spare money we had so she could enjoy her early twenties as best we could afford. Being a few years older, I had the luxury of buying anything I wanted (within reason) when I lived with my parents, but Nikki hadn't really had this opportunity. I felt, and still feel, that she deserves to have treats.

This has led to difficulty in thinking of things that I want to get given as presents at birthdays and Christmas'. If someone asks me what I want for these occasions, I don't have a prepared list of things that I can go to and suggest, most things I would like to get my hands on are too expensive to ask other people for.

I know in the great scheme of things this is quite trivial, but it gives me a mild form of depression at these times, which in turn results in my not really enjoying my birthday in particular.

There's also the added complication for me that I share my birthday with Nikki's dad, and we usually end up spending the day with Nikki's family as a result. On the whole, there's nothing wrong with this, but it does add to my feeling down on my birthday as it's not all about me.

As I said, this post isn't about wallowing in self pity, I'm intrigued to know if anyone else out there that reads this ever feels the same sort of thing. And does anyone have any tips that I can try next time round? Let me know in the comments below.

It's my birthday today (happy birthday me!), but I really feel that there's not much to celebrate this year. 

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